You’re Maurice and today millions of people are holding a march to increase awareness of how much you miss your ex-girlfriend Diane, who broke up with you seven weeks ago. They’re waving banners that read, “She Was Just So Sweet To Him And Then All Of A Sudden She’s Gone?” They’ll carry signs with photos of Diane that say, “He’s Just Supposed To Forget This Face?” They’ll chant, “Hey Hey, Ho Ho. Maurice Misses Diane Because She Let Him Go!”
While many people will be made aware of your heartbreak from this march, it won’t affect Diane in the slightest since she is traveling in India for the next four months. But still, it’s just nice to know that millions of people bothered to get the permits required to shut down thoroughfares so they can peacefully but vocally announce to the world that they know what you’re going through.
Happy March For Maurice Day!