Thursday, April 12, 2012

Give Your Buddy Arthur Twelve Dollars Day!

Got a buddy named Arthur? Today, give him twelve dollars. When he asks, “What are you giving me twelve dollars for,” tell him it’s because you can’t make it to the movies so you wanna pay him to entertain you. He’ll look at the money in his hand and ask,  "Are you serious?“ Tell him, "I paid good money for some diverting amusement from you and so far you suck. Pick up the pace okay? I wanna see some heart. I wanna see a boy trying to be a man and a man trying to recapture how he felt when he was a boy. I wanna see a lady trying not to make the wrong choice even though it feels so right. I wanna see someone fight city hall and win for once. I wanna see a family reunited only to burst apart again. I wanna see my life up on that screen. Also I wanna see two aliens fuck like they did in The Avatars.”

When Arthur refuses and tries to give you a refund, you beat him. You beat him good for wasting your time. You beat him to teach him a lesson about entertainment.

“The audience votes with their feet,” say as you stomp your foot on Arthur’s face.

Happy Give Your Buddy Arthur Twelve Dollars Day!