Monday, November 21, 2005

Help Your Son Burn The Neighbor Kid's Treehouse Down Day

Help Your Son Burn The Neighbor Kid's Treehouse Down Day!

Your son is an undesirable pre-teen and none of the other pre-teens in the neighborhood offer him membership into their exclusive little clubhouses. They claim that he is a homo who is poor.

"But we're not poor," you shout every night at dinner. "I've changed jobs and I had to take a pay cut. But I have stock options."

You know that stock options are a gamble, but their kids can't know that.

"Can they?" you ask the table. Your wife and son say nothing.

Bobby, the pale kid next door just opened a new treehouse. Everyone on the block has been invited up the ladder except for your son.

"This is an outrage," you shouted when you heard.

Your son said, "It wasn't just me. Kevin Waine wasn't invited either."

"Kevin Waine has MS!" you responded.

Your son just sulked. That was enough.

"We're burning it down."


Your son is afraid that burning down the treehouse with his Dad will make him even less popular. A "Daddy's Boy" who "Burns places down when he's not invited inside." But you know that if your son doesn't act now, he'll be pushed around for the rest of his life. Just like your stock options, burning down the treehouse is somewhat of a gamble, and if you lose you'll be sent to jail and your son will be sent to a juvenile facility. But if he doesn't learn to take chances, those kids up in Bobby's treehouse will keep on climbing up that ladder so they can compose funny songs about how gay your son is.

Not gonna happen.

Happy Help Your Son Burn The Neighbor Kid's Treehouse Down Day!