Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Choose Who To Eat Day

Choose Who To Eat Day!

The Oceanliner sank a couple of days ago and everyone in the lifeboat is getting hungry. It's time for you all to choose one passenger on the boat who will be killed and eaten by the rest. You've been doing a lot of the navigating, so the others look to you as their leader.

"This is a very tough decision." say. "It's a burden that shouldn't be left to just any one of us. We should vote on it so that everyone is in agreement. It's the only fair way."

One of the passengers will shout out, "I vote Chris! He's the fattest. He takes up the most space and has the most meat."

A few others will murmur agreement.

Put it to a vote. "All in favor," say.

Everyone but Chris will raise their hands.

"All opposed."

Chris will raise his hand.

"Well, that does it," say. "It has to be unanimous. We have to pick someone else."

Everyone will complain that no one would vote for himself to be killed and eaten by the rest.

"Oh, are you so sure?" say. "Well, let's just vote on everybody and see about that."

You'll spend several hours voting on everyone in the lifeboat. None of the votes will come out unanimous.

Say, "I see your point."

"What now?" a passenger will ask.

"If we can't share the burden, then someone is going to have to act," tell them. "One of us will have to rise up of his own accord and kill another passenger, so that the rest of us may eat. That man will have a great deal of guilt to grapple with as a result, but he will be remembered as a hero by the rest of us."

You and the other passengers will look around at each other, trying to read which of you will be the one to feed the rest. Finally, you'll jump up and lunge at Chris. He'll throw you over the boat. Then another of the passengers will lunge at Chris and will also be thrown from the boat. Then one by one, the remaining passengers will lunge at Chris and one by one they'll be thrown from the boat until only Chris is left. You'll all float together, shouting at Chris to come about and save you. But Chris will just float away in the lifeboat, alone. And you'll all bob in the water together, shouting for a while, then things will grow more quiet as some of you start to slip beneath the surface. It won't be long before you all grow tired and you stop swimming and you let what happens happens.

Happy Choose Who To Eat Day!