Monday, May 26, 2003

No One Can Sleep Day!

You and your roommates should all gather in the kitchen and ask each other some questions. Like, "Why do you think we can't sleep." Everyone will say, "I don't know. Why do you think we can't sleep?" You probably don't know either or you wouldn't have asked.

You'll all sit stiff and say stuff like, "Well, at least we're in this together." The two of you who've been developing a romance will smile at each other when you hear that. The two of you who race each other a lot, like whenever you both happen to leave for work at the same time and you're on the way to the train, one of you will say "Race ya!" and then you'll sprint like there was a bullet trying to catch up to you, you two are super-competitive and when you hear that "in this together" bullshit, you'll share a sneer. The two of you who think farting is funny will fart, one after the other, then you'll both giggle. The one of you sitting alone by the window will remain rigid and still. Say to him, "In this together, right?"

The one by the window will then turn to you slowly and say, real slow, "In this together. Sure." Then he'll turn back to whatever's he's staring at outside the window.

He's staring at a fat naked woman in the apartment across the way. She's naked and she's painting her toenails by the window. She has nothing to do with why no one can sleep.

Happy No One Can Sleep Day! It's just a coincidence.