Monday, May 30, 2005

Your High School Girlfriend Is Now An Ass Model Day

Your High School Girlfriend Is Now An Ass Model Day!

Write to her via Popshot Posters, the poster publishing company that prints and distributes the poster in which you found her. Something like…

Dear Popshot Posters,

I've recently noticed that an old acquaintance of mine is featured in one of your posters. The poster I am speaking of features four women in thong bikinis bent over like animals who've spotted prey with their rear-ends raised and perched atop the closed gate of a bright yellow flat-bed truck. Two bearded, obese gentlemen are hanging out of the truck's driver and passenger side doors. The caption to the poster reads, "Fatso's Butt Truck. Free Delivery. Fort Lauderdale." The model with whom I am acquainted is the third from the left, in the blue thong bikini. Her name is Tamara Hull. We had a thing.

I haven't seen her since prom and I was hoping you'd be able to forward this note along to her. Let her know that I said, "It's Dave! Dave Jesser! I'm good. I'm good. Congratulations on the whole poster thing. That's so great. That's so great. That's so, so great."

Let Tamara know that I'm still in Township Falls and I see her parents around a lot. I never visit Fort Lauderdale but I've always meant to, and if Tammy ever wants to get together and catch up (I'd love to hear about the modeling and what it's like to ride in a truck!), she should send me along her contact info and I'll be in touch. I'm single and my brother died this year.

Thanks Popshot Posters!

Happy Your High School Girlfriend Is Now An Ass Model Day!