Sunday, May 22, 2005

Corncob Pipe Day

Corncob Pipe Day!

Today, when you're emptying out your Dad's house because he's dead and someone bought the house where he raised you and your brothers, you're going to find a corncob pipe. It's the pipe your dad would shove into the heads of all those snowmen that you and him used to make together. Before you got kidnapped.

You were held captive in the basement from fall into the winter of 1989, and you watched those first few snowfalls through the basement window and you thought, "No corncob pipes on the snowmen this winter. Sorry I can't be there Dad."

When you got rescued and the policemen drove you to your house, you saw through the window that the snowman in the front yard had the corncob pipe sticking out of his head. You were so furious that as soon as they let you out of the car, you ran away from home. Before your parents got to hug you even. It would be another three days before you were located and brought home. And you didn't speak to your Dad until the end of the winter.

He tried to apologize once. He said, "It was to show that the kidnappers hadn't stolen your spirit from us. But you knew the truth. He just always hated that you got to shove the pipe into the snowman's head just because you were the kid and he was the dad.

Happy Corncob Pipe Day!