Sunday, September 01, 2013

Get Your Dad To Adopt Your Roommate Day!

“Dad,” explain. “Me and my roommate feel so close, it’s like we’re brothers. It’s to the point where we get angry that we’re not brothers, that the world will only officially acknowledge our relationship to the extent that is delineated by the terms of a lease agreement.”

“But what is it you want?” you Dad demands. He gets excited sometimes. “I understand that you want there to be change, that you want the government to acknowledge siblinghood among roommates who feel such a bond adheres, but I can’t change the law!”

Tell him, “Until the laws are changed, there’s another way for us to be brothers. He’ll divorce his parents and you’ll adopt him.”

“Fine!” your Dad will shout.

After the adoption is finalized, your roommate will kill you with a gun. Before he pulls the trigger, he’ll tell you that he really did feel close to you, but he has to take care of himself too. Next he’ll kill your Dad. As your Dad’s adopted son and sole living heir, he’ll be awarded the inheritance entirely.

Happy Get Your Dad To Adopt Your Roommate Day!