Tell her, “I keep thinking that we were meant to be together ever since we survived that crash.”
She’ll say, “What crash? Who are you?”
Remind her that you were her seatmate on the doomed Flight 363 to Phoenix.
“That flight landed fine,” she’ll say.
“Fine?” you force a laugh. “It was pretty bumpy.”
“It was turbulence!” she’ll say. Then she’ll shout into her house, “Jeff!”
Jeff will come to the door. “You bothering my wife?”
“He’s trying to date me because we were on a bumpy plane together.”
“And we survived!” you remind her. “Why were we put there and allowed to make it safely to land if we weren’t meant to be together?”
Jeff will think about it. “I’ll go pack my bags.”
“He’s got a point, honey,” Jeff will say. “You and I never had no shared experience like that. What’s holding us together? You can keep the kids.”
Jeff will pack his car while you unpack yours and bring your things into the bedroom. Once all your stuff is inside you’ll sit down for dinner and eat what’s left on Jeff’s plate. Your seatmate from Flight 363 will cry in the kitchen.
Happy Survivors Day!