Friday, July 14, 2006

Tiara's Got A Black Eye Day!

Tiara got a black eye last night because she started dancing with a rough girl's boyfriend. Tiara let him take her out back into the alley with the promise of some kisses and some squeeze. Tiara wanted a boyfriend so bad, she ignored all of the warnings she'd heard over the years about how some rough girls who like to fight will use their pretty boyfriends to set up lonely girls. The boyfriends respond to the lonely girls' signals and take them someplace for kisses and squeeze. The rough girl then interrupts the act with several of her rough girl friends in tow and the gang of them beat on the lonely girl and take all of her money. This makes the lonely girl feel even more lonely. Especially when she has to walk back into the bar or the dance in order to grab her coat or her friends and she invariably sees the rough girl on the lap of her pretty boyfriend with all of their rough girl friends surrounding them, the tabletop blanketed by drinks that were bought with the lonely girl's money.

Tiara saw them there, all of them laughing while the rough girl and her pretty boyfriend shared kisses and squeeze. Tiara risked another beating when she stopped and tried to catch the pretty boyfriend's eye. She didn't care whether she got hit again; she was already ugly. But the things the pretty boyfriend said and the way he looked at her out in the alley, it couldn't have all been an act now could it? In the middle of making out with his rough girl, he looked up with one eye at Tiara and she couldn't tell what she saw in that look. Maybe it was pity or maybe it was just a warning, but some of the rough girls spotted her and Tiara made a run for it before they started in on her other eye.

'I just wanted someone so pretty to want me!' Tiara will cry into your arms today.

Try telling her there's someone out there for her and she's just got to wait for him to walk up and say hi.

'You can't fall into these traps,' tell her. 'The rough girls run this city. It's too dangerous.'

Tiara's phone will ring. She'll answer.

'It's him!' Tiara will tell you. 'The pretty boyfriend from the other night!'

Try to keep from jumping up and down.

Tiara will listen and say yes a lot and an occasional 'I liked it when you squeezed that too.' Then she'll ask you for some advice.

'He wants to see me!' she'll say. 'What should I do?'

Tell her to say that she really likes him and she'd like to see him too, but it has to be in a public place, somewhere where there's a lot of people, like a corporate plaza at lunchtime. 'Tell him if you see one rough girl he'll be sorry he was ever born,' say.

'Whenever's convenient for you,' Tiara will say. Then she'll hang up and throw herself into your arms, crying tears of joy.

'He wants to pick me up in his car and park under a bridge!' she'll scream. Then she'll start dancing.

'I'm so happy for you Tiara,' tell her. And you really will be. This just proves that no matter how powerful the rough girls get, they still can't scare away love. Still, give Tiara a butterfly knife to keep in the back of her underpants.

Happy Tiara's Got A Black Eye Day!