Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Some Words With The Creator Of The Robot Dad And Robot Dad Itself Day!

You’re a journalist and you’ve got an exclusive interview with the guy who created the Robot Dad, the groundbreaking new invention that is making the world rethink intelligence and father-son-relations. You’ll also get to speak with the prototype Robot Dad itself.

When you ask the creator why he wanted to pursue this project, he’ll say, “I was looking for a Dad that I could be in control of. My own dad was a drunk and he beat me. Robot Dad won’t do that.”

“He beat you?” Robot Dad will ask his creator.

“Yes,” the creator will say.

Robot Dad will rise from his chair then burst through the wall and take off running. One half hour later it’ll return holding two recently severed human arms.

“I have made sure that your human Dad will never strike you again.” It will toss the arms at the feet of his creator.

“I love you, Dad,” the creator will say.

“I am in love with you son,” Robot Dad will say. The creator will explain to you that there are still a few glitches to be worked out. When you ask him why he gave Robot Dad genitalia, the Creator will say that every child first sees a penis when he catches his father walking from the bathroom to the bedroom.

“Children who are raised by Robot Dads should not be deprived of this developmental milestone,” the Creator will say.

“Have you seen a penis yet?” Robot Dad will ask you.

You’ll say yes.

Robot Dad will look like he wants to ask you if you’d like to see another one, but it hasn’t been programmed to do that yet. The frustration evident in its face will make you pity the robot. It’s been given the gift of intelligence and the ability to reason, but only so far as man has seen fit to program it.

The Creator will also see that Robot Dad wants to say something that it hasn’t been programmed to say, and the Creator will begin to cry.

“I can’t stand watching him bump his head against the limitations of his circuitry,” the creator will say. When Robot Dad strokes its Creator’s hair, comforting him the way a father would, you’ve got a pretty good idea how you’re going to end your article.

Happy Some Words With The Creator Of The Robot Dad And Robot Dad Itself Day!