Thursday, March 15, 2012

It’s An Epidemic Day!

Today people are dropping like flies and you’re scared because you just heard your husband sneeze.

“It wasn’t a sneeze,” he’ll say.

“I believe you,” tell him.

Don’t believe him. You know he’s got the Fatal Sniffles and you know it’s because he wasn’t careful. You know it’s because he saw her again. He probably went to say goodbye to her, knowing the quarantine would send her across the country away from him. He got infected because he was untrue and now he brings this home to you?


Smile calmly.

“It’s dusty in here.”

“I’m going for a walk,” tell him.

There’s kerosene in the garage. Bolt the door behind you so he’s trapped inside and spray the kerosene around the perimeter of the house then light a match. He brought this on himself, and on you. If this is how careless he is with your life, you should have no regard for his. Light the match and get to the Northeast 3 camp. There’s still room in that quarantine for people who want to stay alive.

Happy It’s An Epidemic Day!