Everyone's All Alone, But You Most Of All. Shit. Day!
Peek inside the coffee shop window. Just look at all those people telling their problems to their cups of decaf and deluxe gyro platters. Look how they catch your eye, how they try to hold your gaze, wondering "Why can't I just wave him or her in here. Say, 'Come in. Come in. Let's share a friendly evening together.' I've never killed anybody, and I drink and drive! People are safe with me." But inevitably, they just return to their books of Seek and Finds or their tabletop carvings of cock and ball sketches, and you're left to continue your walk. Or is it your search?
It could be said that with all these lonely people trying to find each other, no one is ever really alone. But you seem a little worse off than everyone else. Make that a lot worse. See, lonliness starts to feel like a disease when you start to think that everyone else in the world is happier and has more love in their lives than you do and they spend all their time interrupting body oil applications to share a laugh about how sad your life is. But when someone is happily in love or surrounded by trusting friends and family, all he can think about is the ones he cares about and he might remember when he was alone and he might give thanks for what he has. People who are not in his life really don't concern him. Except for you of course.
It's true, for most people the feeling of being the joke of society is all a head game played to elevate self-pity. But unfortunately, people really do laugh about you. Not laugh in a "That's so hilarious" kind of way. But like, "Holy shit this is one of those horribly tragic situations where all I can do is offer a little laugh to keep from crying." And yeah, there are a lot of people out there who are pretty lonely, but when you come to mind, it perks them up a bit. "Least I'm not that bad off," they say before turning everything around for themselves.
And no, Captain Paranoia, no one's been watching any surveillance tapes of you writhing on your bathroom floor and moaning. But we can tell you do it alot. Not by your eyes so much as by the way you wear your skin.
Happy Everyone's All Alone, But You Most Of All. Shit. Day!