Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Marching Into The Sun Day!

Today the bus carrying a high school marching band to a competition in California will break down in the middle of the desert. The overweight virginal band-members will pour out of the bus and immediately succumb to panic under the blinding hot sun. The bassoon player will find a bush with berries and he'll call his band-mates over and they'll all quickly strip the bush of its fruit. The berries will turn them mad and they'll become savage. Now communicating only through a language created by the music from their instruments, the band will slaughter the bus driver and strip his body of its meat, which they'll eat by fire tonight.

Soon the fathers will come searching for them. They'll hear the sounds of their children's instruments playing from far across the desert. They'll follow the sound, which will be a loud steady hum as they get closer, into a dark cave. Once inside with no idea how to turn back, the fathers will discover that the instruments are sitting in a drafty chamber of the cave and they were being played only by the wind flowing in and out. That's when the marching band will descend from the walls and slaughter their fathers. They'll strip their fathers' bodies of their meat.

The marching band will survive for many decades, luring rescue teams and nature lovers into the cave with the sound of their instruments, and then slaughtering them and stripping the bodies of their meat. They'll finally disband when a development company levels their cave so that they can open a hotel on it.

Happy Marching Into The Sun Day!