Tuesday, April 23, 2002

Nobody Dies Day!

24 hours. We can do it. Think globally, act locally and we can keep the entire population of the earth alive for one more day. Sometime around eleven tonight, find someone old or really diseased like your dad and pound on his or her chest screaming, "You never gave up on anything in your life!!! Don't quit on me now! Not on my watch!" At midnight, shake his or her hand and say "Way to live." Then head out to the bar, which is staying open an hour later tonight since everyone's going to be running out to celebrate nobody having died. There will be mucho trim.

I'd get good and drunk though because with everyone expending so much energy trying to stay alive today, tomorrow it's gonna be a fucking bloodbath. Not a pretty site, is all I'm sayin'. But hey, it's worth it right? 'Cause today's Nobody Dies Day!