Thursday, February 11, 2016

Wear Something Remarkable Day!

“Remarkable blouse,” your temp will say.

“Thanks, Dylan,” you’ll say to him.

“Remarkable,” he’ll mutter to himself as you step into your office to call your ex-husband.

“He noticed me.”

“That’s great, hon,” your ex-husband will say. “I really hope you find someone.”

“How’s house arrest?”


Your husband is charged with violating building code, reckless endangerment and fraud after putting up a new construction slum and renting it out for $5000 per unit without ensuring even basic support to keep the entire structure from collapsing. You divorced him to keep the tenants from going after your money too, and after being separated for a while you both felt like it worked.

“Go tell that temp your blouse would look even more remarkable on his bedroom floor.”

You do what your ex-husband says and your temp immediately reports you to HR for sexual harassment. You’re fired and humiliated in the press. They’re excited to revisit the one-percenter slumlord story by taking down his ex-wife too.

Why do you listen to your ex-husband? The only thing remarkable he wears is the location bracelet on his ankle.

Happy Wear Something Remarkable Day!