Wednesday, June 23, 2004

Three Hot Young Chicks Day!

When three hot, young chicks who work at the same munitions factory decide to rent a house together, they'd better be careful. The intention was to just have a fun time being hot and carpooling to work together. But hot, young chicks bring in outsiders.

Ultimately, one of you (but not you) is going to start dating a middle-aged man and the other two are going to be confused by her choice, considering that there's an army base nearby. The middle-aged man will be married. And he'll be unemployed. And he'll watch a lot of television.

When a house meeting is called to find out what up, it will be revealed that the middle-aged man is actually a middle-aged Man Of God. The one dating him will say he's shown her a path to walk and she's devoted her life to him. "My body and the use of my TV is the least of what I am obliged to give to him." That's when the other two of you will say, "Ahem, whose TV?"

There'll be some violence in July. None of you will be hit directly, but someone will get scared and jam a finger into a dooframe trying to get away from one of his rages. Eventually, the two of you who aren't dating him will go to his wife and tell her that he's straying. The wife will be another one who believes he's holy and she'll understand that he needs more than just one woman to serve him. Back to the drawing board!

It will be quite a shock when you find that he's been running a meth lab in out of your basement. He'll offer you ten percent of profits and just to not get killed, you'll agree to his terms. Late one night, you and the one not dating him will go down to the meth lab and start a meth fire (after drugging his whiskey with a barbiturate of course). You'll run out to the yard and drag the one dating him with you. She'll try to run in and save him, and you'll end up having to punch her out. After a week of deprogramming, you three will take two weeks to go down to Cancun and try to salvage the rest of your summer.

Happy Three Hot Young Chicks Day!