Monday, June 04, 2012

Pillow Day!

Today’s the day you get to walk around in public holding a pillow to your chest. You even get to spend some time with your nose buried in the meat of it, breathing in the comforting stench of your own skull sweat. So whether you’re running a day care or you’re the CEO of a fortune 500 company, spend the day clutching a soft, warm, happy pillow to your chest whenever you feel threatened, sleepy, or in need of the mother who withdrew her love for you many years ago you fucking infant.

Happy Pillow Day!