Monday, August 10, 2009

Tell Your Dad He’s Gonna Miss Everything Day!

Your dad has been so focused on his career that he’s going to miss out on your entire childhood. You know how upset he’ll be if that happens, so it’s time to go confront him at his job and let him know what’s really important.

“How old am I Dad?” you’ll ask.

He’ll say, “I don’t know. Six? Look I’m really busy.”

“I’m eight,” you’ll say.

“Congrats,” your dad will say. “How about we talk about this when I get home.”

Tell your Dad that he always comes home too late for the two of you to talk. He’s never there to tuck you in. Never there to ask you what you learned today. He works so hard that he’s just never there for you at all.

“If you don’t try and become less focused on work, before you know it I’ll be eighteen and moving out of the house and you won’t have a clue how you missed it all.”

Your Dad will start to cry. Then he’ll realize what’s really important and he’ll throw down his apron and tell his boss, “My son needs me! I quit.”

His boss will shout, “You’ll never bus tables at a Denny’s again!”

Your Dad will lift you up into his arms and carry you outside.

“Wanna go play catch?” he’ll ask. “I have a few hours before I have to go to my second job as a night watchman. I kind of need to keep that one if we want to try and pay the back rent on our apartment.”

Tell him you realize that true change might take a while, and if he wants to continue to pursue his career for a little while longer, that’s fine. “But remember,” say to him. “Every hour you’re at work is an hour that your son doesn’t have a father. So try not to be so selfish.”

Happy Tell Your Dad He’s Gonna Miss Everything Day!