The move out of your apartment went well enough. It's the move into your new place that will meet with a snag. On around their third trip up, the head mover will drop a box in the middle of the living room floor, and he'll slump over the edge of the box and burst into sobs. The other three movers will gather around to place their hands on him and tell him it's going to be okay.
"What's wrong?" you'll ask them.
Another of the smaller movers will come to you and speak softly. "His girlfriend broke up with him on the they day they moved. He moved all their stuff in, then she went out for a soda and never came back. She sent him a letter, but it didn't arrive until after five days of him living in a quiet apartment full of unopened boxes."
The sobbing man will be shouting, "How could she? How could she?"
"Jeez," you'll say. "When did it happen?"
"Twelve years ago," the little mover will say. "He started this moving company the following year, thinking if he did enough moves there'd be so many that he wouldn't even be able to remember that day. Hasn't worked yet."
"Poor guy," you'll think. But a little part of you will wonder whether this is all a ruse to stretch the move time out since you're paying by the hour. And at the end of the move, when they present you with a parking ticket that they'll say they incurred because it was illegal to park on your block, you'll look closely at the ticket because you'll bet they just got their hands on some blank parking tickets so that they can fill them out themselves and charge the customers extra cash. But you won't accuse them of anything because some of them are large men and they're all still in your apartment. Also, the boss is still kind of broken up over everything. You'll tip them well.
"Thanks for using The She Done Me Wrong Moving Company," the boss will say. Then he'll burst into tears. "I'm sorry I thought I could handle this but I can't. I thought that enough time had past but it hasn't. Aw God." Then he'll run out the door. As soon as the other movers finish taking shits in your new bathroom, they'll leave too. Welcome home!
Happy One Of Your Movers Is Heartsick Day!