Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Stop Drunk Texting Your Priest Day!

Hey fther, just thru up in a cab. Dont tell jeesus! Shhhhhhh

Not cool. Your priest gave you his cell phone number back when your parents were getting a divorce and he wanted you to feel like you could call him anytime you needed some support through that trying time. Yes, it was a mistake on his part. He was new to the Parish and just out of the seminary and he was maybe trying a little too hard to be "the cool Priest." But this is no way to pay him back.

Hey father. Lotta wasted chicks at this party. Gonna try for a 2fer 2night. Jealous?

He doesn't need this. Sure, maybe you never needed his help. Maybe you're feeling a little wild now that you're twenty and out on your own. Maybe you think you'll never need the kind of help your Priest has to offer.

Hey Father. Beating off. Right fuckin now. sinsinsinsinsinsinsinsinsinSINSINSINSINSIN!!!

Have you ever asked yourself why you always feel the need to text your Priest when you're drunk? Do you ever think that maybe, when you're texting all these horrible things what you really want to text is...

Father? I need to talk to somebody.

Lucky for you, he'll still be there when you need him.

Happy Stop Drunk Texting Your Priest Day!