Sunday, July 01, 2012

Score Married Chicks Day!

Go into a bar and walk up to the chicks with wedding rings on and say, “I can kill your husband and make it look like an accident so you can live off the insurance. Into it?”

Whichever one is into it will go home and sleep with you first because women love men who are brave enough to kill their husbands. After sleeping with her, tell her, “I’m a cop. This was a setup, but I am so smitten with you that I am going to pretend this never happened.”

She’ll be simultaneously relieved that you aren’t going to arrest her, and flattered that it was her charm and sexuality that convinced you to want to keep her out of jail, so she’ll leave feeling really good about herself. Bonus: you’ll probably have prevented her from killing her husband since she’ll assume from now on that anyone offering to do the deed must be a cop.

If you really love her though, kill her husband. He doesn’t deserve her.

Happy Score Married Chicks Day!