You did it! The Loneliness Police Blotter ran your incident! Check it out:
On Saturday a Lakeside man reportedly went into his garage, forgot what he went in there for, realized if he never came out no one would notice, and he subsequently collapsed in sobs on the cold, oil-stained concrete. The man slept on his garage floor for eighteen hours before returning to his living room to watch pornography on mute.
Happy You Made The Loneliness Police Blotter Day!