He saw your flyer at the coffee shop with the words “Need Friendship” in 24 point font at the top, and a photo of you holding a wiffle ball bat just above a trim of tear away phone numbers.
“I choose my friends very carefully,” he’s saying. His name’s Jenkins.
You insist that you’re the same way. Which is why the flyer.
“For me it’s all about your survival abilities,” he says, letting you know that this is another human hunting situation.
“Makes sense,” you say. You know it’s just a guy who wants to shoot paintballs at you while you run through a cemetery, but you’re really lonely.
“Meet you behind the Dairy Queen then,” he says. “My shift ends at 1 AM.”
You’ll be there. They always go for the eyes, and they never want to hang out after, but you’ve gotten so few responses that you don’t want to be choosey.
Happy Need Friendship Day!
