Tuesday, April 18, 2017

You're Going To Lose Your Job Working The Front Desk Of That Hip Downtown Hotel Day!

She hates champagne.

It's a fact. You know this fact. And if it's your job to give guests a peerless experience, catering to their every whim and desire, should you not speak up when you know something won't be to their liking?

"And send us up a bottle of champagne okay?" the guy says.

You wink and say no problem, continuing to punch into your keyboard. The first name on his credit card is "Dirk." You didn't know anyone was actually named that. You make no mention of it.

"Or make it two bottles," he says.

You give him a smile and a nod. It's going to be a big night for him. You'll make sure he has the necessities.

"Can we get late checkout?" he asks.

You don't see why not. Since he's stayed before you can even wave the fee. You're a good front desk clerk who's ready to give a preferred customer all the time he needs to get to know his new acquaintance.

"There you are," he says as she returns from the bathroom and takes his arm. "They do have rooms, we're all set."

You pause in your typing to look at her, then at him, then at her again. She gasps, loosens her grip on his arm.

"I'll cancel the champagne," you say.

Dirk's confused. "No we want the champagne."

"It's cancelled," you say.

Dirk places his hand on the desk. "Listen, what is this?"

She's staring at the ground, her hands at her sides now, a purse in one of them. She looks both gorgeous and shattered.

"She hates champagne, Dirk," you say.

Dirk looks to her, and then you. He signals your manager behind you.

"I'm trying to order champagne for the room but this guy's being a dick about it."

Your manager asks you what this is about and you say you're just trying to give the guests what they want, and you happen to know that the lady on Dirk's arm does not want champagne.

"She hates it so much we considered serving something else," you say. "Almost went with a signature cocktail, a fizzy grapefruit thing, but the wedding venue would have tacked on $1500 and we realized we were just complicating things."

"Wait, you're married?" Dirk says to her, but she ignores him.

"I didn't know you worked here," she says.

"Just started two weeks ago," you say.

"Give him the champagne," your manager says.

"I got your letter," you tell her. "Your maid of honor handed it to me while I was still at the altar, but I didn't read it 'til I got to Aruba."

"I've added the champagne order back to your room, sir," your manager says, typing into a neighboring terminal.

"It wasn't right," she says. "Did you think it was right?"

"Go to my office and wait there," your manager says. "I'm sorry about all this, sir. The champagne is comped."

"Don't forget the late checkout," you tell your manager. "They think they've got something special and they want all the time they can get to really explore."

"My office!" your manager says.

You move to the back but she stops you.

"Wait!" she says.

The room falls into a pause.

"Was the resort nice?" she asks. "Aruba?"

You shrug. "Lot of pools," you say. "Too many kids though. The kids would have annoyed you."

You head back to the office and wait to be fired while she and Dirk head up to room 718. You assigned them that room because you knew she'd like it. It's got a perfect view of the park where you proposed.

Happy You're Going To Lose Your Job Working The Front Desk Of A Hip Downtown Hotel Day!