Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Your Worthless Sixteen Year Old Daughter Day

Your Worthless Sixteen Year Old Daughter Day!

She's pregnant. The father is a 25-year old, recently married policeman who's already got a one-year old daughter. He's cut your daughter off completely and has made it clear that things will be made hard for her, and for you and the rest of your kids, if she tries to force him to acknowledge that he's the father.

She wants to keep the baby, even though you already told her if she does you'll kick her out of the house. Don't back down. Pack her bags for her and throw her out. Change the locks tomorrow. You'll miss her, but she needs to learn. After all, your mom did it for you when you got pregnant at sixteen and you turned out just goddamn fine.

Happy Your Worthless Sixteen Year Old Daughter Day!