Friday, January 14, 2005

Your Boyfriend Is Blind And High-Maintenance Day!

Your Boyfriend Is Blind And High-Maintenance Day!

All day long it's "Get that for me, I can't see it!" and "What are they doing on the television now?" and "No, you drive!" Doesn't this guy realize that a girl likes herself a doer?

You feel like you're being taken for granted, and you are. It's best not to confront him directly on this. What you should do is start stealing his money. Just a little at a time, but enough for him to notice when he counts out the bills in his wallet at the beginning of every day. Eventually, he'll ask you about it.

"But you knew I'd catch you. You know that I have to keep my bill count exact."

Say, "I know."

He'll say, "I think you felt that I was taking you for granted and so you started stealing from me to draw my attention to a lack that you felt."

Say, "Yes."

He'll swing his stick out at you and cut your eye. It'll bleed, but he won't let you call a doctor. He'll just shriek at you until you go.

Happy Your Boyfriend Is Blind And High-Maintenance Day!