Thursday, December 26, 2002

Read The Pillow Crease's Indentation Upon Your Cheek Day!

If when you awake, you find that the pillow's crease has left a mark upon your cheek that reads, "Nice ass, but where's it headed?", that is your dead grandmother voicing her opinion that you are a very attractive person, but not very bright. And from her experience, a person such as yourself should try to marry into wealth and construct various "traps" to avoid being divorced by your spouse. For example, if you are a woman, give birth to a child that dies at the age of four (not by your hand please, a mother can manipulate her diet to dictate the fate of a life while it lives in her womb) so that you and your husband sink into a twenty year long depression and chemical co-dependency. Your husband may commit suicide, but he's not going to divorce that fine fine ass of yours.

If you are a man, just make sure you always give off an air of confidence. Chicks dig confidence.

Happy Read The Pillow Crease's Indentation Upon Your Cheek Day!