Thursday, October 17, 2002

Baby Lemme Smuggle Your Heart Out Of A Country That's About To Close Its Borders And Get Way Genocidal All Over Hearts That Look As Little Honey Pretty Face As That Heart Of Yours, Aw Yeah Day!

I know a guy who transports port-a-potties for a fairground near the border. The local constable thinks it's kind of funny to have him cross the border to empty out the port-a-potties, dumping the shit on the Godless infidels next door, so when there are port-a-potties that need emptying, he basically has the golden visa.

The next opportunity will be the night of the Fragenshpleisch Festival, when all and sundry will be as drunk as a European Border Guard on a night so close to the end of the world as we know it when they should be sober as judges because people of conscience are going to be trying to smuggle pouty frowny diddly legged hearts like yours in the splashing waste of port-a-potties over the border. There will be a moment when the truck appears to have been cleared and my friend will look in the rear view mirror and see the guard suddenly notice something about the truck and all of a sudden run to the truck shouting "Mop nop!" or some European word that mans "wait." And your slinky little bashful heartyhearty will be so frightened that it will gasp in a big heaping glob of European Festival Goer Piss-N-Shit, but it will turn out the guard just wanted to ask where my friend got the "Ass, Gas, Or Grass" bumper sticker.

So anyway, once over the border, I'm afraid all my friend can do is overturn the port-a-potty and let your heart seep out into the swamp of excrement polluting the beautiful soil of freedom of that neighboring nation. Then, I don't know, I guess someone should go get it. You know I love you baby.

Happy Baby Lemme Smuggle Your Heart Out Of A Country That's About To Close Its Borders And Get Way Genocidal All Over Hearts That Look As Little Honey Pretty Face As That Heart Of Yours, Aw Yeah Day!